Confessions at 23:00
Hey guys. I feel like shit. It's been ages since I did this. Ages since I felt like I wanted to write something for you. Something that you can relate to. Something you can understand. Something that stays with you. But I haven't because I'm a mess. I'm a bloody mess. At the end of 2020 I thought I was finally getting better. I thought that I had finally figured out who I was. I thought I'd figured out my faith. I thought I'd figured out what I wanted. I mean I did. For a while maybe. But I got back to life outside quarantine and I was overwhelmed And it all just got worse. I haven't written here because I've felt so embarrassed and angry that after writing about change and new beginnings, I was back we're I started. Unrooted. Alone. Tired. Faithless. Afraid. I spent 2021 defensive. Shielded. I was done. With me. With people. With relationships. With trying to be better. I was just done. I gave up. I wallowed in self-anger and pity on the inside, ...